Cast (in order of appearance): Marik Ishtar, Hank Ishtar

Date: May 8, 2010

Running time: 4:32

Transcript Edit

MARIK: Geez, it really sucks that I'm doomed to spend the rest of my life in servitude to a king who died over five thousand years ago. Can't I just go outside this one time? It looks like fun out there.

HANK: No! Listen to me, Billy.

MARIK: But my name's Marik.

HANK It doesn't matter what your name is! Heed my warning. For I am your dad and am therefore the smartest person who will ever talk down to you. Because I created you with my bodily fluids.

MARIK: Okay.

(Music starts)

The world is gay.
The world is stupid.
It's me alone who you can trust in this whole tomb thing
I am your daddy guy
I who spank you, whip you, flay you, beat you
I who filled your Playstation with beer
Why are you so bitchy when I gave you a Playstation?
Stay down here
Because it's nice.

(speaking) Remember what I told you, Billy.

(singing again) You're kinda hot.

I'm kinda hot.

And you are sexy.

And I am sexy.

And these are things
Which will earn you
A lot of fangirls!
They'll touch your naughty place!

I won't let them disgrace me.

Out there they will put you in

Their slash fanfiction.

Out there they will glomp
And squee and cheer

Such bad fanfiction.

Why open the door
To all their vile perversion?
Stay down here
Be faithful, Billy

I'm Marik

Be grateful, Billy

I'm Marik

Do what I say
And die
Down here

I'll die
Down here

MARIK: (speaking) You know, I can't really use my Playstation if I can't go to the store and buy video games for it.

HANK: Okay, that does it. I'm gonna go pour beer in your X-Box 360. That's a red ring of death waiting to happen.

MARIK: (singing)
Hid beneath the desert within halls of rock and stone
Gazing at the moonlight up above me
All my life I've wondered as I toil down here below
What that friggin' Pharaoh guy wants of me
All my life I've yearned to see their faces
Caring not if they should hate or love me
All my life I've wondered how it feels to pass a day
Not below them
I would show them

And out there
Living in the sand
Give me one day out there
'Cause until then I'm banned
Exiled forever

Out there
Where they all live unaware
What I'd give
What I'd dare
Just to kill and slay out there!

Out there where I'll be free to track them down and end their lives
Through the dunes and villages I'll hunt them
Every man will shout and scream and cry out for their wives
While I grab their babies and I punt them
If I could carve their skin
I'd torture every infant

Out there
Dueling in Japan
Win some card games out there
And buy some spray on tan
Then read some yaoi out there...
Just one day and then
I swear I'll make them beg
And despair
Won't relent
Foes, beware!
Even if Bakura
Doesn't care
I'll have spent
One day
Out there!

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