← "My Funny Skankentine" #6: "Everybody Hates Mako" "Cliffhanger" →

Cast (In order of appearance): Yami, Yugi, Mako, Tristan, Téa, Joey, Mokuba, Kemo, Weevil, Kaiba

Date: August 05, 2006

Running Time: 5:55



YAMI: Actually, I do smoke marijuana. It's good stuff!

On the beach

YUGI: It sure was nice of you to share your fish with us, Mako.

MAKO: Haha! Don't worry, my friends, there's plenty more where that came from!

YUGI: We should probably get going.

MAKO: Leaving so soon, are you?

TRISTAN: What a swell guy!

TÉA: I like that he doesn't wear a shirt.

MAKO: (throws a harpoon at Yugi) Heyaa!

YUGI: Ahh!

TRISTAN: Holy [bleep] on a [bleep] sandwich!

YUGI: Did-- did you just throw a harpoon at me?

MAKO: I-- I didn't want you to leave... and I wasn't sure how else to get your attention.

YUGI: Just ask! Just say "Hey Yugi, could you stay a little longer?" Don't lob a freaking harpoon at me! Seriously, that's like the rudest thing ever!

MAKO: Hey Yugi! Could you stay a little longer? Maybe-

YUGI: Well it isn't going to work now, not after you almost skewered me..

MAKO: I'm not entirely sure what to say.

YUGI: Maybe it'd be best if we just left.

MAKO: No hard feelings about the harpoon incident, right?

JOEY: Get bent, ya freaky fish guy!

MAKO: I am not a freaky fish guy!

JOEY & TRISTAN: Mako's a freaky fish guy!

MAKO: At least the ocean will never leave me, right ocean?


MAKO: Why don't you ever answer me, ocean?

Title sequence plays

Pegasus' castle. The Mission: Impossible theme plays, and Mokuba is escaping form a window.

MOKUBA: (Falls) I probably should have thought this through! Ooh!- oh!- my back!- ow! Man, I sure am glad I'm a cartoon!


YUGI: That Mako guy was a f***ing psycho!

JOEY: It's enough to make you appreciate that Pegasus fella!

KEMO: (holding a kid) Attention Duelists! My hair is assaulting you!

TRISTAN: I'm actually going to do something for once! (grabs Kemo and throws him) My voice gives me super strength!

KEMO: (lands and attacks with a flying kick) Yes, but my hair gives me the power to defy gravity!

TRISTAN: (knocked down) Oh the humanity!

KEMO: I somehow found out that this kid doesn't have any star chips, so I'm going to throw him off the island.

TRISTAN: Cool, let's go watch!

KEMO: (throws the kid into a boat) Get in there, you little runt.

WEEVIL: Hey, heh-heh, don't rock the boat, buttmunch.

KID: But I didn't lose my star chips, they were stolen from me! I swear it on the life of my pink shirt!

YUGI: Don't worry, we'll get your star chips!

KID: You'll bring them back to me?

YUGI: I never said that!

MOKUBA: (bursts out from the bushes) Thanks to this awesome disguise, you'll never be able to figure out my identity!

JOEY: Hey, it's Kaiba's shrill voiced little brother.

MOKUBA: You'll pay for what you did to my big brother, Yugi!


MOKUBA: Seto! What's wrong?

KAIBA: They wrote my character out of the show, Mokuba.

MOKUBA: No way! But you're Yugi's arch rival!

KAIBA: And I haven't been in a single episode since he defeated me. Since he's the star, he thinks he can hog all the screentime to himself. I mean, just look at Bakura.

MOKUBA: Who the hell is Bakura?

KAIBA: Precisely. Now, I'm going to hide in some undisclosed location. You stay here and guard my multi-million dollar company while I'm gone. 'Kay thanks.

MOKUBA: But Seto, what if an evil group tries to take over while you're missing?

KAIBA: Oh come on, Mokuba, what are the odds of that happening?

PEGASUS: So let me get this straight, gentlemen. Now that Kaiba-boy has gone missing, your evil group wishes to seize control of his company?

BIG 5: That is correct!

MOKUBA: I f***ing knew it!

End flashback

YAMI: For the love of Isis, are we going to duel, or are we going to stand around having flashbacks?

MOKUBA: Thanks to you, Pegasus abducted me! And my brother's company is about to be taken over by corporate suits!

YAMI: ...all because I beat him in a card game.

MOKUBA: That's right!

YAMI: You're some kind of moron, you know that?

MOKUBA: A moron who's got all your star chips! (He steals Yugi's star chips)

YAMI: Damn that kid moves fast!

MOKUBA: Stealing makes everything better!

YAMI: Wait, Mokuba! You mustn't do this thing! Think - what would your brother say if he saw you now?

KAIBA: (in Mokuba's mind) Well done, Mokuba! Now steal something from Joey too.

YAMI: Ok, but what would he say if he wasn't a complete douche bag?

MOKUBA: You're right, Yugi! I'll return all the star chips. Just as long as you let my brother back on the show.

YAMI: That's fine by me.

MOKUBA: And maybe you could give Bakura a bigger role too.

YAMI: Don't push your luck, kid!

In Kaiba's hiding place

KAIBA: I've designed these new hologram doohickeys so they'll help me defeat Yugi. I'm sure the cold hand of science will be able to overcome his magical powers.

Pegasus' goons appear

GOON 1: Don't move a muscle or we'll shoot you with our invisible guns!

KAIBA: I'm too rich to die! (jumps out the window)

GOON 2: There's no way he could have survived that fall.

KAIBA: Actually, I seem to be okay.

GOON 2: Nope, he's definitely dead.

KAIBA: You guys are idiots.

GOON 2: At least we're not dead! Like you!

KAIBA: You'd better not be stealing my deck up there!

GOON 2: (steals his deck) He won't be needing this, now that he's deceased.

Duelist Kingdom, near the boat

MOKUBA: We brought the star chips!

KEMO: (knocks the out of his hand) Rejected! (Grabs Mokuba) I'm glad I took all those child-grabbing classes.

YAMI: Unhand him, you nameless henchman!

KEMO: Meet me at the dueling field in a few hours and we'll discuss it.

The text "time passes..." appears on screen and Jeopardy! 'Think!' music plays

At the dueling field

KEMO: Attention, Duelists! I'm still not going to unhand him!

TRISTAN: What a pointless interlude!

TÉA: Wait, guys! That looks like Kaiba!

KAIBA GHOST: This time, Yugi, you don't stand a ghost of a chance!

"TO BE CONTINUED..." appears at the bottom of the screen

TRISTAN (offscreen): Oh no! He has even less personality than before!

Fade to black

On the boat, out at sea

KID: I sure hope Yugi brings my star chips back soon!

WEEVIL: Shut up and row, dumbass. Heh-heh-heh.

End. The Hues Corporation song "Rock the Boat" plays

[tune in next week for
the long awaited
Yugi vs Kaiba rematch. kinda.
well, not really.]


MARIK: My name is Marik!

BAKURA: I don't care.

MARIK: What if I told you I had exclusive knowledge of certain secrets?

BAKURA: I don't care.

MARIK: Once I possess what I desire, the Millennium Rod will mean absolutely nothing to me.

BAKURA: (dramatic pause) I don't care.

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